Money, sex, and power


#1

I’m sure my post comes down to the usual three but I had to get you to read my post!! So, here goes…

My wife and I share a home in Charlotte, NC and we have discussed divorce several times. It is evident that my wife does not want a divorce (as she is quitting her job within a month without my approval to go to school full-time). I certainly cannot afford to find a new home while paying a mortgage payment on one home, so I have a couple of questions that I would greatly appreciate some assistance in working through.

First, do you have to be seperated for one year before you file the papers or can you file the papers while living together? If file now will the court hear my case in 30 days and at that point do I have to tell them that we have been seperated for 1 year or will it take a year for my complaint to be heard? As it is now, for all practical purposes, we live completely seperate - she lives in a seperate bedroom and I live in a seperate bedroom, we eat seperately, we have had no sexual contact, and we barely see each other. It’s been this way for almost a year now. Can this count as seperation time?

Second, the money issue. My wife has a good paying job with great benefits that she has decided she wants to leave so that she can go to school fulltime. I am totally against this idea. She has decided that I will make up the lost income somehow (I guess I will make it magically appear) as she has decided to no longer contribute to the monthly household expenses. Due to the fact that she will not have any income in one month, the zero income in your child support calculator makes a big difference as to how much I have to pay in child support. Would I be able to include her income now as she is quitting her job voluntarily and is able to work? Does this also make a difference in waiting to file vs doing it now (due to her lack of income in the future)?

Anyfeedback would be greatly appreciated.