My child lives with her father


You need to contact the sheriff to have your child returned to you. Their wishes are not always the best ones and if he has a drug/alcohol problem like you state then he is not fit, nor is it fitting for your child to be exposed to that environment. And I would go back to court to modify the existing order to state that he must submit to clean analysis before exercising his visitation with the children without supervision.


I agree with the above. Firstly, just because she says she wants to stay doesn’t make it legal. YOu have to either a) go back to court to submit that it’s alright and get it into a court document, or b) you and your ex need to do that on your own, submit it to the court and make it legal. Either way, your daughter simply choosing to do so doesn’t make it legal. For all you know, her choice could be one made because she wants pot or alcohol, or is being bribed to stay by your ex buying her things she normally couldnt’ have, etc. THe judge will want to talk to your daughter, being she is of an age that is considered old enough to do so, and the judge will be able to gauge exactly why it is she wants to go with your ex. But yes, definitely contact the sheriff and file something in court immediately, your ex is violating the court order.


If you are going to have a significant change in the custody situation then it should be put in writing. If you are concerned about the care your child will receive with her father, you can go to court to enforce the custody order that is currently in place.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044

Durham & Chapel Hill Office
1829 East Franklin Street
Building 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780


The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.


My oldest child who is now 15 just recently decided to live with her father apart from her brother and i…I was not informed of this until after they went on a trip out of state and my daughter texted me and said she was not coming back. My concern is my ex has an alcohol and drug problem and has “admitted to giving minors wine and pot”. I would like to know what are the legal matters i must do to make sure my child is protected from him giving her drugs or alcohol? Can I make him submit to drug testing while she is living in his household? We have custody papers that state i have primary physical custody with joint custody. Should we go to court to modify these custody papers or should i just let things be for now?