Not sure where to go from here


#1

Your short term affair will have nothing to do with property settlement. That is completely different. North Carolina is a no-fault divorce state. There will be equitable distribution which means that your wife will receive half your retire, the home, etc. Depending on the value of the home you may can work it out where you keep your retirement and she gets the home but I would check the value of each… you may come out better making her pay you for your part of the home and giving her half the retirement.
I doubt that she can make you pay for her attorney but anything is possible.


#2

Illicit sexual conduct by the supporting spouse w/ the dependent spouse having no similar fault can require an award of alimony to the dependent spouse (as per statute!), and said award may also come with attorney’s fees award to the dependent spouse (as permitted by statute).


#3

If you are the supporting spouse that means the court will order you to pay alimony, however the amount and duration are still within the discretion of the court. In this case it sounds as if the court would have ordered you to pay support anyway. I do not think this issue will have a significant impact on alimony.

If she gets an attorney to pursue alimony, you could be required to pay those expenses.

Adultery will not have an effect on the property distribution, unless you spent money to pursue an affair.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044

Durham & Chapel Hill Office
1829 East Franklin Street
Building 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780

ROSEN.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.


#4

Thank you for your reply. We are still trying to work things out, and it’s an on again, off again battle. I hope it doesn’t end up in a divorce, but I want to be ready if it ends up going that way.


#5

I wish you the best of luck.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044

Durham & Chapel Hill Office
1829 East Franklin Street
Building 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780

ROSEN.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.


#6

I am in a long term relationship, and it’s been going downhill for me emotionally for me for awhile. But the physical relationship has been nonexistant for MANY years. I hoped that things would get better, so I’ve stayed with her all these years. But last year, I made the mistake of sleeping with a co-worker for some NSA sex. My wife has since found out, and we are trying to work things out. But I don’t think that it’s going to work out.
What am I up against? She gets a government check from an injury at work years ago, so she does have income. But I still make a little more than she does, so I am expecting spousal support of some kind. I understand that NC has equitable distribution, but does the adultry hurt me there too? Neither one of us can afford an attorney, but could she get one, and make me pay for it?
We own a house, cars, no savings, and I have my retirement that she will go after too I guess. Am I going to loose everything I have because of a really bad decision?