My girlfriend and I had been together off and on for a good 3 and a half years or so and have a 6 month old child although we had been together this time since a month before she got pregnant and we just split up a few days ago. She was residing with me and her basic job was to take care of our son while I paid the bills mainly because without much education or experience the only type of job she would have been able to get would have been not worth working given the amount of money that would be spent on childcare. Well the relationship went downhill and she has decided to move back to her parents home and live with them and she took our son with her. She claimed she was moving back home because she does not think we are meant to be together although she has given several excuses for leaving already such as I wont change and she is not attracted to me anymore and she can do better for herself living back at home and so on and so forth. She does smoke marijuana and she does drink socially, now I was under the understanding that she had stopped smoking marijuana once she got pregnant and had only smoked here and there when she was stressed over her limits after the child was born. Those limits seemed to be stretched everyday as of the past 2 months it seems though because she has been admitting to being high on her blog online just about every other day. Be it that she has no job although both her parents are working and both have better jobs then myself and be it that I have been at my place of employment for 2 years now and make decent enough pay to take care of him as he should be taken care of. Heck I was paying, rent, utilities, food for both of us adults, formula, phone, insurance so on and so forth basically every bill there was and now without her here that is one less person running up electric bill and eating up food and so on and so forth as well. Well she has had issues living with her parents already with them kicking her out and she moving out previously, now she claims she will stay there until she gets a job and save money for 2 months after getting job and then move to her own place. First off I did not want her to take my son when she left but she claimed I could have him half the week and she will the other half until we decide together what to do with the situation. Well I am not going to be getting back together with her at all and I want my child out of that home, it is a unstable atmosphere and she is basically living off of her parents, she has no income to even get gas to go get a job how can any court allow her to have custody over me when she does not have a stable job and/or a stable living arrangement because her parents could kick her out at any time like they have done before and my child would be going right with her to wherever she ended up and that’s not right for the kid and it worries me. I have been thinking about it for awhile now and I do not think she is a fit parent for him since she smokes marijuana and she cannot provide anything for him other then change diapers and give milk, anyone can change diapers and give milk but if you cannot buy the stuff that’s where the issue comes into play. Yes her parents can help but her parents will not be getting custody so do they play a role and if so do I have a better chance at getting full custody then her because everyone of my friends tell me that we will get split custody no matter since child is under a year old. I do not have a problem with making daycare arrangements and I do not have a problem financially at all either as far as taking care of him and I have been renting the home I am in for 3 years now. She is not going to better herself at all and is basically using my son as a bargaining tool and money trap. I want whats best for my son and I do not think that split custody is good enough. I do not even think that she is a responsible parent at this point to even take my child away from me and put him in a situation where he does not have his own room better yet where she does not even have her own room. Also I thought I might add that my work schedule is a 4 day 10 hour work week although I can change at anytime I want to 5 day 8 hour days my job is about 45 minutes from where I live but my childcare arrangements I am getting lined up are of no concern to time he is dropped off or picked up I just figured I would thrown that in in case my having a different work schedule is worse then her not having a work schedule because yes she can logically spend more time with him since she has no job but without a job she is living off of her parents and thus I should be getting custody since I am the only one in the relationship who can provide for him financially at this time======all I am asking is what are the odds I will get full custody based on what I have explained?
There is no set rule or custodial schedule based on the age of the child. The court will set custody based on what is in the best interests of the child. You will need to file suit for custody in the near future to ensure your son is protected.
So are you saying it is in the best interest of my child that he be w/me at least until she gets her own place----if she cannot take care of herself how can she take care of our son?----and when you say file suit in near future do you mean I need to get on the ball w/it b/c of the situation?
I am not making a determination of what is in your child’s best interests. I am suggesting that you can use the mother’s poor choices and home environment to argue that it is not in the child’s best interest to remain primarily with the mother. You should file suit to get moving on the case immediately to ensure you can schedule court dates to ensure you are seeing your child.