I am Active Army guy, the one thing I did when my command ordered me to pay my spouse was provide my attorneys business card to the command, and told them to contact the attorney so my legal rights within the civilian laws were not violated. I advised them to refer my former spouse to my attorney whanever she called also. (She called Twice and no more after that)Your son must do this in a compassionate way explaining the situation in it’s entiretly and perferably before she calls the chain of command. If your son has a good record with the chain of command and has a decent chain of command they will have a route to protect themself with thier higher chain of command, and your son is also protected by the attorny. The former spouse has a route to air her grievence and request money, and the circle of divorce continues.
As for custody he needs a good attorney, HE MUST show stability, with what we call the “family care plan” get it done, legitamate, and have the support network established prior to going to court. Beleive it or not there is thousands of single parents in the military, I am one been doing it for a long time. And if you show things are established and in the best intrest of the child and which they must be in order to win … Best of Luck - GET A GOOD ATTORNEY.
Disbelief in the system