Vistitation and 50-b charge


#1

Hi Erin ,
I’m trying to help a friend out, so let me give you the scenerio to see if you can help answer some questions:

Husband is legally separated, they have 2 minor kids
Wife has temporary custody with Husband getting them every other weekend
Wife agreed to do pick-up’s and drop’s off’s of kids at Husband’s residence (marital home)
Husband got filed a 50-b yesterday saying he was stalking wife for taking ONE picture of her & her boyfriend at a church yardsale (public event & parking lot)
Husband’s attny is telling him that he MUST exchange kids this weekend in a public place due to the 50-b, NO OTHER exceptions (OR choose NOT to get the kids this weekend)
They go to court on Monday for the 50-b charge (Husband only got 1 business day’s notice to be in court)
Just because Wife filed a 50-b, does that mean Husband is considered GUILTY until proven innocent??? I thought that’s why they go to court…for the judge to decide the validity of the 50-b claim??
If that is NOT the case, then ANYbody can file a 50-b on just whomever they choose…and they will be considered “guilty” until court. THAT does not make SENSE if that’s the law!!

Please share your input. Thanks so much for your valuable service.


#2

I’m not a lawyer, but…

Having just lived through this, I can say yes, a 50-B is enforceable as soon as its served :frowning: until the 10 day hearing. I wasn’t even allowed to see my kids during this time and even worse she filed a false claim saying I violated the 50-B and I spent 2 days in jail :(. She claimed I tried to pass along a message to her through her mother. Her own mother was willing to testify that was not the case, but I still spent 2 days in jail. What a wonderful Memorial Day weekend I got.

I also was only given 1 business day from the time I was served (late Thursday night) and my court date (Tuesday over Memorial day weekend).

The 50-B is a temporary “emergency order” meant to protect someone from a violent situation. And yes just about anyone can go and file a 50-B against a spouse or other immediate family member at anytime. The guarantee of the 10 day hearing is the only relief. It is obviously very easy to abuse this order and attempt to use it to gain some upper hand during a divorce/separation in my opinion. And there appears to be little repercussions for doing so, or at least none that any lawyer seems willing to pursue.


#3

Wow Spidermonk, sorry you had to go thru all that…I really do appreciate your input. This has got to be one of NC’s CRAZIEST laws EVER! What happened to INNOCENT until PROVEN guilty!!! GEEZZ!!

Let me ask this…if the ex (who was served) is in a public place (public pool) and the “accuser/filer of the 50-b” comes in, are you supposed to get up and leave?? Just how much lee-way is there…does it depend on who was there first??

And when you go to “exchange” children in a PUBLIC place (as the attorney suggested he do), how is that not violating the 50-b? And who’s to say she won’t CLAIM he hit her, threatened her, etc, etc at THAT time??

All of her claims were UNTRUE to begin with. This just baffles me as to how they can have stupid laws like this. Sorry…just venting away frustrations!

Any advice on what NOT to do to prevent getting thrown in jail BEFORE the court appearance? If she sends a text to him and he responds, is that considered a violation??


#4

Again just from my understanding and what my lawyer told me…

[quote]Let me ask this…if the ex (who was served) is in a public place (public pool) and the “accuser/filer of the 50-b” comes in, are you supposed to get up and leave?? Just how much lee-way is there…does it depend on who was there first??
[/quote]

From my understanding yes. I was told I had to leave any public area immediately if I saw her. And no it doesn’t matter who was there first :(.

My 50-B said I could call the children via the home phone only (no visitation). I was advised by my lawyer to not even do this as if she answered the phone I would have violated the 50-B and she could claim I “threatened her” and have me thrown in jail. She said it sounded like a trap. My wife then sent me text msgs asking why I wasn’t calling the kids trying to make me look bad and feel like crap.

If he is adamant that he wants to exchange the kids before his hearing go to your sheriff office and ask for an escort. I did this when I needed to get some stuff out of the house. I also did this after the 50-B was dismissed and replaced with a rule 65 restraining order (this is a mutual non-violent, non-emergency restraining order that we both agreed to) and she refused to get out of the house. They are happy to give you an escort especially if you have a 50-B. Then he will have a witness to so she can’t claim anything.

I’m not even sure how your friend can even arrange the meeting though. Since that would involve some type of contact/messaging. Maybe via the sheriff’s office again.

It could be. Best to avoid all contact until the hearing in my opinion. Remember I spent 2 days in jail for calling my mother in law. Made it kind of fun explaining it to the other inmates :).

And yeah I vented a lot too :(. Have him get a good lawyer. You can see my other post detailing what happened with my 50-B.


#5

The ex-parte order does not adjudicate him as guilty of anything, but does allow for temporary protection of the Plaintiff until the court can determine if the is cause for a continued order of protection.


#6

Found out there was no ex-parte order…just a 50-b filled out and signed by the Deputy Clerk of Court’s office (no judge signed it). What is the difference between this and an ex-parte order (or both)??


#7

A 50-b signed by a court official is a valid restraining order.


#8

She dismissed the 50-b charge BEFORE it even got to court. I don’t understand why people go through the trouble of filling out the paperwork. In our town (and from my experience), I think attorneys “advise” their clients to file this charge…mostly to get a upper hand on temporary possession of the home and temp custody. But in this particular case, ALL that was already determined. So who knows what she was thinking???

Has anyone else experienced 50-b’s in their particular divorce cases? Just curious how readily these are done nowadays.