Dear Another Non:
Greetings. You are both residents of North Carolina if you have lived here since July 2002. Now, the “state of residence” for the military is usually for tax purposes, not legal filing for divorce.
In NC, the laws of equitable distribution control who receives which pieces of property. Generally, houses are sold or held by one party and refinanced so that the other spouses’ name comes off the mortgage. If you cannot refinance the home, yes, the court may force you to leave the house and relocate to an apartment or other location. Generally it will take months in court before anything like this will happen though. Your best bet is to hire an attorney and to have the attorney negotiate with your husband for you to receive alimony, child support, and your property under the equitable distribution.
No, you will not need proof of abuse, unless you want this to become a heated battle. Focus instead on cash flow needs and work with your attorney for the best solutions for you and your children. Best of luck.
Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Divorce
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.