Do men get justice

even if it happened before…its still dangerous is what I mean!!! Still much [:D] to you and no hard feelings though

Sorry Shadow I did review what you wrote! I agree with you about guns and I think though that even a five year old shouldn’t be at a gun range with psychological problems. I apologize thought for addressing you…i will be more careful[8D] inthe future! I just really hate guns and get a little upset about this issue…thanks for not getting too upset!!!

No hard feelings and nope didnt get upset, just wanted to point out that I was NOT the one that posted that comment.

And i agree with you totally on a 5 year old, here I think the age before you can take gun safety is either 8 or 10, then only then after they pass should they be allowed. I hate guns too hun, they make me shiver just thinking about them, but I was just putting that input about finding a compromise because there is alot of issues out there about gun control… another big prob with this country. My belief is no guns but others out there will disagree and that is their right just trying to point out a solution for both to be happy.

But I do know that is not your case, that your husband was like that before you was married, just thought it might help someone who is going thru it to help them work out a compromise with their spouse.

Again I just wanted to point out that I was not the one that posted, cause it was disbeif that posted it.

Gezzz disbeilf get me in trouble [}:)] LOLOL
[:D]

LOL

I did it again…

that your husband was NOT like that before you was married

Dont know why I keep forgetting to put that not after your hubby

lol

Thank you shadow…he’s crazy but like most of you…they all are aren’t they? It’s just hard for me to find any compromise because of the psychological problems (to elaborate she threatens to kill him with his gun). Anywho…at least we all got a good laugh from me responding too quick…which always gets me in trouble now that I think about it [;)]

She is saying that? Wow poor kid! keep up the fight on the no guns! He will just have to learn to keep his passion to himself for the best interest of his child.

I know my kids think I am a bully cause I wont even let them have paint guns. nor did I ever buy them a toy gun.

I have a bad habit of flapping my lips before i think things thru [8D]

Ok, I admit I started the gun thing. I did not intend to offend anyone and get the NRA involved. Soccermom if this is such a passionate situation then provide the court with eveidence, to change the custody arrangement. I know thats easier said then done but, Does she have documented pysch problems ? You have proof of no hearing protection, proof he didn’t like guns prior to this ? all of these things should matter.
EXAMPLE: I have always loved guns and love to fish. My wife thought guns were a waste of money so I never hunted or shot while we were married, No problem with that but now she’s not a part of our lives and I have a nice collection and enjoy a Sat. shooting with my children (with Hearing Protection no physc problems and safety in mind always)so I didn’t do it while married but, now I can That does not make me crazy simply a part of me my ex kept me from doing just like lots of things she kept us from doing…

I do take offense to “crazy like all of you” expand on that please Soccermom, everyone in my life does beleive I am crazy but, they also know me and know my intintions. Even crazies have rights unless your in a divorce and or child custody case then only the lawyers have any rights IMHO … LOL

Disbelief in the system

Hi Disbelief
Thanks for the reply
This is all true on what everyone is saying but lets look at the whole picture in my case if was of same color as the judge would the out come be the same??? Maybe but lets look at this the STBX lives in a 2 bedroom appt the kids share the same room they do not eat right they are left alone (unsupervised) for about 4hours or more thye fight like cats and dogs all the time when they are there I seen my son the other day he has a black eye now from where his sister has hit him this has never happened when they are with me I took a picture of this to show the lawyer and the court. They are coming home to me today and the 3 of us are going to talk about this I know it will not be easy but it needs to be done and to STOP this is wrong and I know this.
No one can tell me that having an affair is right I think we all know that but to sit back and tell the other that they are sorry for what they have done is a bunch of crap they have no respect for that person and them selves and to anyother person and why should they its about EGO think about it I sure did and learned this type of person is a loser and a loser is cheat and will always be a cheat no matter what is done. They can never wipe away the shame that they have done to them selves and to there EX LOVE one sorry this is all but true.
But who really is the one who hurts its not just the EX spouse but what about the children? they are the ones who get hit, hurt, and ran over when all this crap happens and what about when they get older are we as the adult showing them that this is right? NO we are we not we are need to show them that this is no right and show them the right way my daughter thinks nothing of her mother my daughter knows of what she has done and has told me of this I tell her plese do not ever think nothing less of her she is your mother. She says ok and thats it but deep down I know she does not want to be around her she has told this to me aswell and it hurts me the STBX has no clue of all this she is so blinded of her EGO what a loser.
But I think we can say this instead of putting energy towards hate lets put the energy towards love is this hard YES it is very hard to do this why because we think so much negative instead of positive look at your news and newspaper nothing about or to little about positive only negitive and that is why we think like that its hard to show love why? I do not know maybe this is why I do not look and read the news so much hurt to much for me I would rather plant a flower or a tree with the kids maybe I am weird who knows but I feel good about it [:D] Is the system fair well I think we can all say NO and lets hope tha in time the system will change and us humans will too.
Thank you

Hi ARTHURP : How long have you been going through this if you don’t mind the ?
I hate to say this but I do beleive color in the court matters but, not when it comes to custody and or divorce. Let’s face it we have this thing between our legs that creates the perception that we are to provide for all, we have millions of dollors and we don’t care about our familys. Oh by the way we are all crazy too LOL . So hand everything over and keep all the responsibility, too bad about the kids caught in this mess. The court only see’s what the attorneys put forward and that is predetermined before white black green yellow red male with that little thing between the legs ever walks into the courtroom. That is my take on the system anyways THATS THE PROBLEM
Will the system change only if the lawyers change and I really don’t understand it my case should have taken all but maybe 15 minutes to solve yet 3 years later 4 or so Judicial reviews 3 trial dates, 5 or so continuances where my attorney thought about appearing if I was lucky showed and left twice and only one opportunity to sign anything (the two X 5 page documents for someone who has a paycheck 100% obligation for 3 kids and debt that outwighs any assets we had . Wow what a ride I pray it’s over but must say I lack any trust in the " SYSTEM and justice for all " Hence my Disbelief in the system…

Disbelief in the system

I am sorry it was worded funny…I meant that my ex is crazy like most of your exes are or we wouldn’t necessarily be writing here [8D], but true it was a little too general but I was in no way calling you crazy…just your ex…sorry if any offense was taken I was merely trying to state that everyone has their problems too an perhaps I should be in such a tuft about this…sorry I promise that from now on I will watch how I write things…touche again shadow[:D]

and disbelief (I did it again didn’t I[:D]) sorry!!!

[:D] soccermom I think we would be great friends if we lived in the same town LOL dont know how many times I say oh no that is not what I meant I was trying to say LOL …[:I]

Arthur… I have been seeing your post since I found your site, and I feel your pain and understand, and wished that you did not have to go thru all that… when you are saying that you are sueing the OM… I am cheering you on for your case and saying you go everytime I read it. And all the bad things yes it gets frustrating hearing it, you go out and plant flowers, me I am just counting the days down until summer so I can go camping again during the weekend, something about being out in the wildreness listening to the wolves at night and not seeing another person but my family is a great escape to forget and get away from it all.

Disblief… the troublemaker[:D]… Just because I dont believe in guns I know alot of others do and it sounds like you are one of the good ones that takes responisibility, what I was trying to point out.

I am a woman… I have been on both sides of the fence… I have walked in both shoes… heck to post my stories on here will give you guys some good reading for the whole day. Both sexes do get screwed… some just think they do and some get the royal job… but from all that I have been thru I would have to say it is men that get the worse of the deal… (no I am not the second wife). I dont know if race has lot to do with it, my state is basically white and indians… so I cannot really give a statement on that but I do see that men get the royal treatment right from the get go[:(]

shadow…I think so too I fiond myself thinking of one of my best friends (going no really what I meant was…oops my fault) As for men getting screwed I think that I agree with Shadow too. It seems to be that all get screwed in this system and mostly someone we left out, the children

quote:
[i]Originally posted by Shadow[/i] [br]It dont matter what race, men do NOT have no rights. You would not believe the horror story of what my husband is going thru, even the judge said it was not right BUT he rubber stamped him with what she wanted. I have wrote our congressman and was contacted by them that I have to start with my local state legislature if I want to make some changes. So I did write them and was surprised that I got a call back couple of days ago and one of them is interesting in meeting with us. I know it will be a long battle to change some of the statues, heck the state legislature dont even meet for another year I have been told, but we are willing to start making some changes in our state and instead of all these guidelines and stautes they need to look at them case to case

As for writing to congress, I’m doing the same thing. I swear we need to get enough people to do the same. I was left out in the cold in my case. I have posted about it on here so feel free to read what happened to me. My problem is that I know some judges and I have talked to them about what happened to me and they don’t agree with the outcome either. When I asked what I can do about the judge I was told nothing but vote against her. This is her last year. I just can’t believe there isn’t something in place to keep a judge in check. Sure, you can appeal it but then I’m told it just goes back to the same judge.
Anyway, I think everyone with a story should wright to your congressman or woman and let’s start getting something done.
I was reading where someone wrote about the “lazy woman” just getting money because she is lazy. I believe some of that is true. I think that a lot of these laws are still on the books from the old days where a man would go out and work and provide for the family and expect his wife to just stay at home. Well in those days women wouldn’t be able to go out and get a job if the husband left them so yes, he should provide for her. Today, that isn’t the case. Hell, I’m the one in my case that has one job in the family and is supporting my mother. The ex is married with two incomes in the house and is now getting a third from me. Does that really sound right? I’ve always supported my child financially and have always had him. The court took him away from me for no good reason and then said I have to pay her for it. She left me for another man years ago, I didn’t leave her. So, should I really be paying her for all that? I don’t think so and I know a lot of others don’t.
So, again, I’m just saying we should all get together and do something about all of this!!!

Don’t expect writing the folks in our state congress to do any good. Where do you think our “no-fault” divorce laws came from? I believe that getting the stories out to the general public would help, but it’s not easy to do. For example, I told a newspaper reporter about how my nutty exwife had taken out a bogus restraining order on me when she took off with our child. The reporter replied, “our judges would never issue a restraining order without some evidence of wrongdoing.”

Sigh.

chrome I am in a tad bit of a hurry right… just hopped on real quick to see if SOCCERMOM wanted to be my FRIEND [:D]

but I will be back on tonight, and will look over your story. Mine I have not posted anything really about it yet, like I said there is alot in my life.

But yes things do need to change! And I want to try and give my time to do it so that it works for BOTH sides, but I dont think there will ever be a answer that will make everyone happy. But from what I am learning that the statues are basically set up for one maybe 2 ways, and times have change and they need to look at all possiablities because cases are different. I am just trying to change the law to look at other things.

And I do have a good feeling cause staff from my congressman call me back and told me where to start… which I will tell you to find out who the local state legislature in your town are. If you dont know call your congressman office they will have a list of them and tell you how you can get a hold of the ones in your hometown. I wrote my story to every one all that list. And one of them did call me back for a meeting. Dont know what the next step is or what good it is going to do but something in my story had to get his attention since he gets tons of compliants but he did want to meet with me.
Once I do talk to them I do plan on going to papers, at least it is one thing on my list, but taking baby steps at first. Like i know first I have to bring it to the attention of the state legislature and then I will find the next step and do that.

But I am only one voice in one state, I have already thought I need to get some back up in my state with similiar stories but first I want to get one of my state legislature on my side. And why I am trying to get as much evidence that i can cause like one post said about second wives… which is untrue and that I have been on both sides of the fence… so I have at least experienced both and how I decided that men do need more rights, in marriages and with children.

Children do pay for all this, but I just pray that they will look at our generation mistakes and not make them and make changes. But at this rate we are not teaching them any better [|)]

Shadow you just need to email me because we so need to be friends[:D] Fatherdoright I can tell by your emails that you are a caring man, you get involved and help people anyway you can…sounds to me like you probably are a great dad…I wish you the best

Ok , Before anyone reads this my case was the extreme or I became the extreme not sure which one So I begin my rant, what is anyone doing about the system !
When I first found this board about a month or so maybe more I asked for situations of Child support complaints lawyer complaints put my e - mail out their ya know what no one replied alot of people complain but does anyone act !!!
Ads to the newspaper just might go out soon
Well you know what someone here called me a trouble maker geuss what YOUR DARN TOOTEN RIGHT

My two attorneys said the same thing so has the NC State Bar LOL cuz ya know what Alimony is not based on "need and Ability only " pay her $ and you will do better than the judge will award, Geuss What J/A attorney get up there and tell my side of the story completly - in it’s intirety - If not then I will …(Judge was a little P/Oed but the truth was told)
Judge Ordered Less than she wanted , and for less time than what I had agreed too !
Military Pension: Attorny say 50% of a 20 carear right,
NOPE - proportionate to length and time of marriage and geuss what 120 months of marriage at base pay as of date of seperation And yes attorney I can and do provide you with what the High 3 Base Pay as of Date of Seperation and that is what will go in the order …

SBP : Nope for my children only thats right put it in the order she dosent want to pay C/S

That’s all I lost (besides my sanity for a while) only becouse I drove them as crazy as they drove me, and you know what ?
I will never quit the LAW IS TO BE followed Geuss what Mr Masigraite, Grievance commitee, Fee dispute commitee If the attorney won’t do thier Job then geuss what I have and will force you to do it,
I have paid a price for this attitude emotionally and finacially and only if I knew what I know now I would not have lost a thing I beleive, and came real close to not setteling after what my second attorney did (Not Sure but Swear he represented my EX at the same time …)
but I stood my ground fought for what I beleived to be right and reasearched as much as I could and you know what ? Two attorneys said fire them at seperate times and you know what I think they really wished I had, but why I paid them for a service, when I did consent the last thing we said was thank you to each other …
I do hold the attorneys accountable for their actions, which led to a simple divorce being pure tourture and torment … Heck when the clerk of court knows who you are eventually I will eiather change the system and the wrong doing or I will die and early death which means less for the EX…
WRONG IS WRONG and repersentation never should be forced, neither should settlement. One soldier is usally better than none but 10000 usally will get some attention on a border… SO COME ON read the Law follow the law and fight for the laws to be followed more importantly report the crook lawyers to the STATE BAR don’t call just write .
We can’t just complain about a situation, when you really feel your right based on facts documents and the laws.
Oh by the way Geuss what there is not an attorney out their that will sue or report another attorney for negligence malpractice etc. they all want to settle HMMMMMMMMM YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN now if we band togather and every week the bar gets a compliant CSE gets a complaint, Judicial Review gets a complaint, county commisoners gets a complaint … Who Knows I do know one complaint in a lifetime means nothing … Ok done enough I feel better now !!!

Disbelief in the system

Bottom line is that men should keep their zips locked until they are sure the woman they are opening them for is the right woman!

I think thats what part of the lesson with the child support system is!

Hi all this subject is very touchey to all mostly men and I think we all can this the system we have right now is based on the 60’s the old thinking that women are the ones who of dependent some cases this is true not all the time today both work out side the house.
I will say this when I was with the STBX I did all the cleaning cooking taking care of the children and everything else that was to take care of a home she never did nothing for the home when she did the dirty clothes piled up there was 2 weeks of clothes that she never did thats not just mine but the children and hers and the dirty dishes it was a nite mare. I even had my job to take care of and I took care of her salon I am not showing off but I know what it takes to take of a home and to take care of the children and to run a buz when only one is putting and the other is not what happens (its called being a carpet) thats what I was to her.
Now taking care of a home is a job a full time job men dont think not I hope you see that. If not try it I have 2 children 2 dogs thats a full time right there on cleaning. Yes they are starting to help not the dogs LOL.
Now should this been told to the courts maybe but would he listen heck no. Was treated fair with the STBX heck no I was a slave to her she had it made with me dinner every tiem when she got home the cleaning done the children feed and cleaned all before she got home but it made me into the person that I am right now.
The system needs a lot of changing and only in time it will tell you how bad it is if women get full coustody she can get help fromthe gov. men can not tell me I am wrong on this this is why she wanted the children not the love but the one word for her MONEY thats all and this is where she is failing she is not going to get full maybe 50% and thats it or she will lose them no matter to her its all about money and in time she will see this.
Does anyone have the same problem not just men but woman too.
Thank you so much