LOST in NC... Please help!


Unfortunately, if one spouse wants a divorce and the other does not, the one who wants it can get it after a one year separation. I am willing to bet there is a third party in the picture here and you need to find out if that is the case. An excuse like you are not the wife you used to be is just that…an excuse to justify his own behavior. Check to see if joint accounts have been closed. You need an attorney and can get PSS support since you are not employed. It may take a while so sock away what you can. As for attorney fees, don’t count on it. And as always, it’s best to try to come up with an agreement on your own. I am sorry this is happening to you. Wish I could do more because your situation sounds so much like mine was. I hope things turn out better for you.


You may want to start by attending one of our seminars, that will give you a good overview of divorce law and what your rights and options are.

P.S. Please feel free to bring up this or any other topic on our live call-in show every Wednesday at 11:00 a.m. EST. Visit radio.rosen.com for details

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044

Sutton Station
5826 Fayetteville Rd. Suite 205
Durham, NC 27713
Phone: (919) 321-0780


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I have been with my husband for 15 years, married for 9 years. He says he wants to separate and divorce due to the fact of me not being the wife I use to be.I am a full time Nursing student, the mother of our two children ages 6 and 10. I am unemployed, he is employed. I have no income and do not want a divorce or separation. He will not go to counseling. We have both discussed things but he feels it’s best to call it quits. I don’t want to give up but if the time comes, how am I to pay for legal representation to make sure I am doing the right thing for me and my children? He works one job and does a little yard work so he considers that his job. I have the kids, their schooling, my schooling, all the bills to keep in order, all repairs to the home or cars I take care of, all Dr. Appts. for everyone to take care of…I feel like I am losing it! He doesn’t understand there is not enough time in the day for all the attention he claims he requires and stated I knew that when we got together. I started going to Church hoping things would get better. He refuses to go. The children and I have been saved and Baptized and I think he feels left out. We no longer go out and have the occasionally drink so I think he is feeling alienated. We beg him to go with us but he doesn’t. Even when he is home, I have to do everything.
Can anyone help guide me on the direction I need to take if he truly goes through with this? He has asked me what I want put in the papers for separation. I have no clue where to begin. I have no money for legal so can he be forced to pay my legal fees? I want the marriage to work and am trying hard daily to do what I can. It just isn’t fair. [V]
Thanks for letting me vent.