I’m going to sound like a mom now…That’s because I am, and I have a child about your age…I know I wouldn’t want my child going through the hurt and pain you are going through right now…Love means many things to many different people…Yes, you have to go through rough spots in order to get to the best parts of a loving relationship…But that shouldn’t take away from who you are, it shouldn’t make you feel awful, and it shouldn’t make you so angry…A loving relationship means compromise, not ridicule…Standing up for yourself should mean you care enough about who you are to do so, and people who really care about you should understand it, or at least try to…These are lessons that are learned in time, we don’t get instructions…21 is such a great age…Learn to live life for yourself, not for something you may or may not get from someone else…I hope the best for you…
Girl for one… been there done that. 9 years of my life to the man, love - hate relationship. He has Bi-Polar also. We had 2 children, and I felt obligated to try to make it work, no matter what he did. Shoot, I could be here for hours telling you what I went through. You have to make your own decisions but I can still give you my opinion. If you have to, live with your family, get a job, take night classes. You are a powerful woman and you can do it. You may not get what you want as fast as you want it, but once you get there, you will be so proud of yourself! Don’t look back, just forward! I left my husband in Dec. 2003, I thought we were getting along good after the seperation, I met him one day in Feb. of this year to talk about the kids, next thing I know, I was tied up with zip ties, being beaten, he slashed my face with a razor knife, raped me, dared me to speak unless I was spoken to. Finally after 7 hours of hell & almost death, I got away on foot, then he took off in my car. He was caught the next day and is still in jail awaiting trial facing a total of 88 years in prison. I hate that he did that to me, but even more I hate what my children have to go through only being able to see their dad for 15 minutes once a month. Sorry, I guess I vented a bit myself. what I’m really trying to say is that you are young and you deserve to be treated good and with respect and you should put yourself and your future first. Honey, my prayers are with you. April
I think my husband has that!! I feel the same way as you do! My husband’s issue is his skydiving and the spending money and wanting this life of being married but not knowing if he wants to be married! I’m tired too! I’m scared! I don’t know what to do! I love him but he steps on me all the time because I voice what I need from him. Because I voice that I need stability for me and the boys. How do you know if they are Bipolar?
This is what I posted in the legal page:
Hello, I just wanted to know what is my right if my husband chooses to move out, at first without my consent but then with, and then in a couple of months, I move to another state? I’m a teacher. I have two small boys ages 3 and 5. I have no family in NC. We have a history of being separated because he didn’t know what he wanted, his job closing and he having to transfer but not wanting us to move with him. He lived 2 years in KY where he was working for a company that made him travel all around the world for sometimes months at a time, while I lived in FL. I lived in FL because he asked me to stay and complete school so I could help us get somewhere financially (my parents could help me with my son). I didn’t want to stay but I listened to him and I did. In one of his work trips, he broke a leg skydiving and had to recover in FL and left me pregnant. During the pregnancy, he went thru this, “I don’t know what I want anymore” thing. If he came to visit my older son and I 5 times during the pregnancy that was a lot. He made it to the birth of our second boy but never returned until six months later. I believed in us and I continued to fight for this marriage to work. He finally got a non traveling job in NC and I picked up my boys and moved to NC. We have been here 2 years. Last year, he went thru that, “I don’t know if I want to be married” thing again. He happens to get us in a lot of debt in this process with his skydiving hobby and his skydiving getaways. I feel that I am emotionally abused, always alone, always asking for affection, always wanting for him to want to do things with his beautiful family. But there is never time nor is there money to do things with us, but yet there is time and money for him to do his stuff. I try not to listen to people’s advice; I have given this marriage 200%. I’m very lonely and I am scared of staying in NC because I feel I still won
Hi, I recently posted in the Attorneys Respond forum but thought I would use this forum to vent for a while. I am 21 years old, have been married for close to four years. My husband and I have had continuous problems throughout our relationship and marriage and I am to my breaking point. He cheated well almost two years ago but I didn’t find out until last year around this time. We broke up of course, but then he convinced me how much he loved me so I let him come back(like an idiot) in October. Since I am in college and it is so hard to find a job that will work around my school hours, he agreed to pay the bills and support me through school which I have three years left(I have to wait until next year to actually begin the curriculum classes due to a long waiting list). A few days ago after constant arguing he tells me how he is not happy here because I “whine and nag” all the time. I admit I do let someone know when I have a problem with them, but I do not sit and constantly nag and complain like he says I do. He tells me that he only acts happy to “be a nice guy” and all the things he does and how he acts is only because he did not want to hear me complain when he wasnt acting how I wanted him to. SO, with that said, he is leaving me with all the bills which equal close to 900 bucks a month and had the nerve to call his dad and ask him how much alimony he thinks he should pay me, he says he doesnt feel he owes me anything because I could get a job if I really wanted to. I have been in school for the past two years and finally have a chance to really finish what I thought I would never be able to. I probably should have known this would happen because he has walked out on me in the past, but for some reason I guess we can call it love, I wanted to believe he would change. No way on earth I will be able to afford the expensive attorney fees, and oh yeah added bonus he is taking the brand new car we just bought a month ago, which is in both names. With his bi-polar problems and abusive actions at times, I am to the end of this whole deal, I love this man to death even after the way he treats me. He is still here, today he tells me he loves me, after he said that I could feel my heart filling up with a mixture of anger and hate. I am tired of being stepped on, put last in line next to his job, and always put down when he is in a bad mood. I am supposed to cater to his needs because after all he is the one who brings in the money for us, which he likes to point out everyday often times more than once a day. I know this is long and I do apologize, but I do feel much better. So thank you very much for reading this![:)]