Im sorry to hear that im in the same boat as you my wife left me and the kids after 15 yrs of marriage,for a scum bag (hes got a criminal record longer than my leg)but we pray alot and just take it day by day.Yes there are days that are bad for us but I try to be strong for my kids(since there mother isnt seeing them on a regular basis)I guess what im trying to say is dont let your heart become spoiled there will be someone else down the road.
I myself havent decided to move on yet I still love my wife and want her to come home.And my heart hasnt told me to move on yet,but i guess that i know if after the year waiting period she dicides to stay with him im gonna have to come to terms with myslef but thru all of this my heart has remained true to my kids and my wife.I hope you find the answers you are looking for but in the meantime I also hope and ill pray you dont let your heart become sour for the next person you meet.
If you get him fired then your alimony claim won’t be worth much! If you’re truly interested in quintessential revenge read “The Prince” by Machiavelli.
The saying is, “Living well is the best revenge.” Go on with your life and be happy without him. That will hurt him more than anything else you can do. Indifference from you is more painful than anger. It shows that what he does doesn’t matter to you.
You know what that brings up a great question.Whay if anything could you be responsible for if you got your spouse fired?? Well i geuss if it could be proven that it was you.
first, we were never married. we were in a serious relationship for almost 8 years, and we both agreed on putting off marriage and it just never was a big deal.
second, as far as new relationships go, i can’t see myself ever trusting anyone again. this breakup is huge, and my heart is shattered.
he doesnt want me back. i have tried everything.
This too shall pass. Try to think of it this way. Who is more powerful than you? For me, it is only God, or, the one I call God. If you have a higher power, then He is the only one who can ruin your life–not the putz who left you. Don’t let him take ONE MORE DAY away from you. Look in the mirror, see your beautiful smile, and realize that someone will fall in love with that smile. NO ONE but your higher power can do anything to you.
I have to agree with Mathkittycat. Move on with your life, you will get past this and realize how foolish you were to beg him to take you back. Your value is so much greater than his.
My ex left me twice, the first time I pleaded for him to come home, he did and after 2 month I knew he needed to leave again, he finally did. I moved on with my life, I wasn’t going to let him control me. A year later he was begging to come back, I had already moved on and saw what type of pathetic a man he really was. I wasn’t going to ever let him control me again. He is now the one that is suffering. He lost everything that mattered and will now live a life alone and bitter.
You will trust again, there are some great people out there waiting to meet you!!!
I know that revenge sounds great in the abstract. But after the anger and emotion is gone, you will still have to deal with the guilt that will come along with it. You may not think there will be any guilt, but I promise you there will be a lot and remember that right now you are the one you can walk away without any baggage. The best thing you have right now is that you know you did your best and nothing else.
Remember what the good book say"NO WEAPON FORMED AGAINST ME SHALL PROSPER"and “LET YOUR ENEMIES BE YOUR FOOTSTOOL”. I’m not a religious person but if you can get your mind right and know that everything happens for a reason and as you go through this storm that you are currently in(and it probably will get worse before it gets better)but you must know it will get better and when it does get better and you are not worried about the things that happens around you there will be such a calm and peacfulness about you that revenge will not even be a issue. trust me I Know. My wife left , she left me with the child and all bills, I pay her child support and on top of all that I’m getting audited, I’m actually broke ■■■ hell and i spend all of what I have on my child but I’m not worried because I came to realize that all of this was to much for me to handle and I just told the man upstairs to deal with it and whatever happens to me or my situation I blame GOD but understand GOD does no bad deeds. If you knew me a year ago you wouldn’t believe I would be giving this type of advice and the only thing I can say to you is trust in GOD!!!
The best revenge is for you to move on with your life and not look back…make friends, take a class, date, do something special for yourself…
Two years ago a good friend of mine was in a similar position. Her husband left her for no apparent reason after 8 yrs of marriage to start dating someone. She was lost. She got involved with her church, rediscovered her old friends and made new ones and about 6 months later started dating someone she met on-line. They dated for about 1 year and now are married and expecting a child. She has never been happier. While revenge may sound sweet it will leave a sour aftertaste. His deeds will not go unpunished. You deserve better.
revenge is not a good answer. In the end you may be happy about it but it will not bring you confort. If you beleave in god. God says Vengence is Mine! I would say get involed with a divorce support group or even get involed in your comminity or go to church. But The worst thing you can do is sit at home wondering whats going to happen next. The key is to get out of the house and on with your life.
Find somebody to beat him up once a month and his employer will finally wonder what is going on with him and won’t believe that some random person jumps him all the time. Or find his girlfreinds ex and revenge date him. Or have some guy call him every once in awhile and ask for the girlfriend, say they had a good time in the champagne room or something.
I understand where you are coming from. I was in an awful marriage, controlling, manipulating, abusive, all that and worse. After I left my ex found a chick to move in with (to mooch off of). After a year of them living together, she confessed she has been cheating on him with her ex-who is married-for 3 months. All the while I have been going to college and will graduate this summer. Success is the best revenge and bad things come to those who deserve it. Besides she’s a stripper, she’s probably a drug addicted ho who will do him wrong pretty quickly.
OMG just live a good life youll meet some one else dont get someone to beat him up my wife of 15 yrs.walked out on me and our 2 kids but i havent resorted to violence…
She asked for revenge tips to get her ex fired, not to be consoled with “revenge is living a good life”. I gave her what she asked for and maybe it sounds silly to you, but sometimes imagining physical revenge makes a person feel better. It would be nearly impossible to find a stranger who would repeatedly beat another guy up but I gave her what she asked for. She knows she’ll find someone else later in life but we all know it takes some time to be able to get the ex off our minds and move on to the next person. During that time wishing our ex the worst and hoping for bad things to happen to them is a normal part of the process of mending a broken heart. She has a college degree, she’s obviously articulate and smart. Let her indulge in some revenge thoughts before she moves on to a better relationship.No one on here gave her real ideas for revenge. In fact they put her request to the side or denied it altogether. She’ll do the right thing but there’s nothing wrong in fantasizing about the wrong thing in the meantime.
ok but can’t we think of more harmless but just annoying types of revenge? How about filling their name in to all of those “I would like information on_____________” forms that you find in magazines, at Walmart etc - this way my ex got info on doll collecting, bed wetting, becoming a Jesuit priest, the NRA, and home pest control…
thanks you all, i kinda felt better reading some of these replies, at least it got me chuckling.
i agree with X… fantasizing about the worst happening to my ex gives me a sense of glee deep down inside.
See? Who needs help now? The grieving process starts with anger and ends in acceptance. If you don’t go through the emotions,(not MOTIONS), you will never get to the end. I LOVE the idea about “more info on_______” but my aunt did that to my father and he went to the postmaster general and told him it was ME and they investigated me for mail fraud!! Honestly, be careful with revenge. It may not bite YOU in the butt, it may bite someone ELSE’s butt! Good Luck to you sadgirl. I hope you are happygirl in your own time!
quote:[i]Originally posted by fatlilbeagle[/i]
[br]This too shall pass. Try to think of it this way. Who is more powerful than you? For me, it is only God, or, the one I call God. If you have a higher power, then He is the only one who can ruin your life--not the putz who left you. Don't let him take ONE MORE DAY away from you. Look in the mirror, see your beautiful smile, and realize that someone will fall in love with that smile. NO ONE but your higher power can do anything to you.